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Monday, April 6, 2009

Why We Changed in Difficult Relationship?

Natural, human beings have a tendency to follow the same pattern of life without it realized. Just imagine when you move to new home, most likely you will be putting items in the same position with the old house. This proves how difficult it is to change habits or patterns of living that we have been doing for years.

The same thing happens in a relationship or a pair. A pattern began to form at the dating or marriage. Unconsciously we tend to do the same thing repeatedly and will be very difficult to leave.

Interesting that in our relationship is not only related to the pair we are, but also with parents, auntie, sister, brother, cousin, and more. Habits that we create will affect how their reception.

Such as building up, every practice that we create as a brick layer we put on the wall. Habits that will later take the pattern of previous behavior. When we are aware since the beginning of a habit that will cause problems, indeed a wise action to immediately change it before it established a pattern which is difficult eliminated.

The pattern can also arise because the habit in the family and past experience in our relationship. Trends that emerged is our old habits to succeed in the new relationship. Here we hope to put many of our couples. Expectations that arise because we are finding ourselves in our own pair. A study on the psychological relationship that we tend to find the pair that has a semblance of life personality with ourselves because we did not want to change too much.

In fact the relationship is actually a process, not a destination, which should make us more mature and understand about ourselves and our pair. In the process of maturation will certainly occur, and many of the changes.

So what is the exit:

1. There is no right or wrong in solving problems together. When you try to win in an argument, you lose something very valuable, that is love.
2. Any issues, if identified since the beginning, will be more easily solved with mutual listening, respect and the desire for change.
3. Relationship not just friendship, but partnership. Focus yourself to teamwork and mutual sharing.
4. What will you give you receive. This universal law of life applies also to the relationship. If you want to be beloved, you must give love. The more you give the more you receive.
5. Realizing that the relationship is the most perfect medium to identify yourself through your partner. So stop carp and complain. Instead start taking more responsibility and love.

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